5/20/2011 | By: Alex

Texts

If someone ever heard my sister and I talking or attempt to read the messages we keep sending each other we would probably end up in the loony bin.
It's not just that we sound as we were on crack... It's... I don't even know how to explain what goes through our heads... Clearly, it isn't coherent thoughts.:D

Sis: I have a test for you.
Me: Ok. Hit me.
Sis: You are in a desert. And you have a cube. What sort of cube is it?
Me: Large, as big as me, purple, and with frayed edges.
Sis: Ok. You also have a ladder. How is the ladder?
Me: Twice as big as me, bends at the middle and it's made out of bamboo, very light.
Sis: Ok. You also have a horse. How is the horse?
Me: Purple!:)) It is a mare. And it is named Milka. It has white spots.
Sis: Um... Ok. Where's the horse?
Me: Well, it's just half of the horse is purple, the other half is buried in sand and I can see some bones. Milka is DEAD!
Sis: Ok... You have a vase too. How is it? Does it have flowers in it?
Me: No. It had water once but it evaporated since I'm in a desert and now it's empty.
Sis: Ok. A storm is coming. What happens with the objects after the storm passes? (And with the mare and yourself?)
Me: The horse is completely buried now. I hold on to the vase but it fills with sand and I'm carried away by the wind. I'm flying!
Sis: ...
Me: So, what's the result? Am I as insane as I sound or even more so?
Sis: Weeeell... The cube is you. The ladder is your carrier. The horse is your life partner. The vase... well, the flowers were supposed to represent your friends. You figure it out.
Me: Oh shit... I don't like your test. Find one for crazy people. I'll pass that one. On a happier note: my partner is gonna be a zombie and together we shall rule the world!:)
Sis: It's okay, sis. I said I'd hide in the cube until the storm passes and I lost the vase and the horse and the ladder.:))
Me: :)) Yeah, don't worry. There are plenty of zombies out there.
Sis: Oh, and I put the vase in my head at first.:))
Me: So your friends are all in your head? Am I imaginary too? Are you imagining me answering you about this right now? My life is a lie! As is the cake!
Sis: Yeah, right, your partner is a she...:/
Me: Nah, it just seems that way because his dick fell off when he became a zombie.. He now uses a replacement... Please stop me from continuing! My mind is in a ditch!
Sis: I've put it on* the head (the vase).
Me: Oh damn... Well, rub the vase, a genie might come out:))
Sis: ...
Me: I just killed a spider and felt good about it until I realized his relatives are probably going to come to the funeral... Where should I hide the body?!!!
Sis: Sis, are you alright?
Me: No, I'm serious. Everytime I kill a spider I wake up the next morning with spider bites on my body. It only logical to thing more are coming to the funeral, right?
Sis: Whatever you're high on, I want some of it.
Me: Nope, sorry, I'm all out of cake... I ate a chupa chups today and it made my tongue purple. Do you think it had anything to do with that? Because if it did, I'm buying more!:)
Sis:You're awesome!:))
Me: Eat a candy. U'll have weird dreams:)) Or a cake... If it's from Amsterdam. I'm going to bed. 'Night, sis! Weird dreams!
Sis: :))Yeah, did you get any souvenirs from Holland lately? 'Night.
Me: Um, no... I wish... The next country I will visit is going to be Holland though:P And then I wanna go to Scotland to peek under the skirts of hot boys with bagpipes. I'm curious if they go commando. I bet it's breezy. I'm going to sleep now. Bye.

I love my sister... I'm sending her some candy with the next package so she'll have a purple tongue as well.:))
5/16/2011 | By: Alex

Happy

This isn't really an update. I just wanted to say that right now I'm the happiest person in the world! Ahem... The happiest ZOMBIE in the world!:D
5/13/2011 | By: Alex

Links

I've always been convinced that the best way to get rid of an obsession is to indulge it. And to a point I've always been right. Until I got an assignment for a 30 page paper for next week and I discovered the following websites for the past couple of hours (ok, maybe I've been reading them for more than that:)):

http://mylifeisaverage.com/

I am on vacation with my family in Paris. Today in the Louvre museum, my dad and I stared at blank walls and ceilings near the art, for extended periods of time, just to see how many people would try to figure out what we were looking at. It was all his idea. This is why I love my dad. MLIA
Since taking the PSAT, I've been getting a lot of email from colleges that I usually delete. I've only saved one so far. The subject? "Our Campus is Zombie-Ready. Guaranteed". (The University of Chicago's)LIA. 
Yesterday, I named my recycling bin Azkaban, and I named another random file Voldemort. After sending Voldemort to Azkaban, I left my computer for awhile. When I came back, Voldemort was no longer in Azkaban and was back on my desktop. After repeatedly sending him to Azkaban and him coming back, I can honestly say: I'm scared. MLIA 
Today we took my grandma to look for condos near our house. One was perfect but she refused. She said it was because she could see her future out the window. We looked. It was a cemetery. MLIA. 

This remindes me of this joke I told my grandma once:
"Conversation between an old lady and her grandson:
Old lady - I'm going to the cemetery on my bike, ok?
Grandson: - But who's bringing the bike back?"
Regardless to say, my grandma stopped speaking to me for some time.

 I recently discovered a new way to stay on top of my dieting .. how you may ask? Duck tape my fridge so i cant get in it .. thank you 101 uses of duct tape options.. MLIA 
This of course made me ask google for 101 uses of duct tape:

http://www.thezac.com/ducttape/

Apparently they exceeded their number and are now at 252 uses for this wonderful thing.

Tape keys to bottom of car so you never lose them
Pet rain gear.
Headbands.
Chastity belt.
Make work gloves.
Wallpaper your house (may be slightly expensive, but well worth it for the resulting sophisticated look).
An entire roll can be used in place of a bedroom door to keep someone in for hours.

Also from MLIA I found this:

http://dearblankpleaseblank.com/index.php?&page=7

Dear boyfriend,
Thank you for being so awesome. Anyone else would look at me weird if I randomly burst into pirate-talk.
Dear Mufasa,
I could have sworn cats had nine lives. Sorry bro...
Dear universe,
BANG!
Dear math,
If I want to know when the trains meet, I'll just listen for the explosion.
Dear smokers,
 Need I say that these websites are already in my bookmarks? :D
I will never finish that paper...
5/08/2011 | By: Alex

Cassie

I haven't drawn my characters in such a long time...
So here's Cassie, main character to one of my favourite stories:
Cassie
I plan on colouring it as soon as I have time (meaning, in probably about two weeks when I'm done with school homework).